Gillian Key: The Hateread: Key to Redemption, Chapter 19 (NSFW)

So while Gillian and Perrin were banging in an alleyway, they were being spied on by an unnamed vampire.

a book titled Who Could it Be, Pooh?

Dracula is “Gillian’s mystery patient.” Wait…what? I have a vague recollection of a mystery patient, but it sure hasn’t been mentioned since.

Oh, ew.

The man she’d coupled with was a monster, yet she had been docile, compliant, a lovely receptacle for the semen that the Vampire knew had been expelled.

I wish I could say this was purposefully gross, but I’m not sure it is, word choice aside. Every dick-swinger in this book has, at one point, seen her as tiny, petite, etc., which is code for “I can do whatever I want to her.” This is just a more explicit version of said same idea. Gillian smells like “snow on mountain clover, sunshine and wet, hot sex,” in case you needed a reminder. That sounds like the mix of odors that hits you in the mall whenever you pass a Bath and Body Works and a Yankee Candle Company right next to each other.

Dracula decides he’s going to visit her as a potential client. Why not start an entirely different plot 80% of the way through the book? It’s actually an improvement over the first two books books, starting the second book in the last 3% of the first one. He turns into a “night-flying raptor” (soooo, an owl?) and flies away.

We hop into Aleksei’s head now. He’s jealous, “but not because she’d had sex with Perrin in the alley.” He’s jealous because Perrin can spend all night with her and he can’t (because vampires sleep in the ground and shit). How does he know she had sex in the alley?

dnno2

Well, Evolved Aleksei is now dialing back to Inferiority Complex Aleksei. He frets over whether she’s unhappy because he can’t sleep next to her, because you have to be unconscious next to each other to be in love, doncha know. I can’t share a bed with anyone for more than a couple of nights because I can’t sleep with someone in my bed, so clearly my partner and I aren’t properly in love.

He goes right on whinging.

wambulance2

He’s jealous. Fine. Jealousy happens. Constant worry about whether your partner really loves you is a mark of anxiety (no I will not say the f-word), which would also be fine, except every single time Aleksei thinks about their relationship, it always, always comes back to himself and how everything affects him. PS, Tanis and Jenna are in Egypt for some reason; just noting it in case it becomes important later (lolololol).

After three pages of whinging, Gillian comes in, and we hop to her head. Gillian thanks him for being “great” about letting her deal with Perrin. You say “great,” I say whining man-child. He runs her a shower and she invites him in so he can keep whining and then insisting he knows best about what she needs. They discuss her encounter with Perrin in a surprisingly reasonable manner, then go to bed.

Why not jump heads for a fourth time to Perrin? He lets us know how totally awesome and kind and amazing and super cool and great she is, and he reflects on how “utterly passive” she was until after they’d first had sex.

baby making an 'ew, gross' face

This whole page and a half is pretty much just Perrin summarizing what an amazing therapist Gillian is and how she helped him so he can go on with his life, as if we hadn’t read the same thing at least three times. He calls for a flight back to Paris…which I assumed he already had, but whatever.

We’re back with Gillian and Aleksei. Ooo, do we get to play Bad Sex Diction this time? Yup!

plundering her mouth

old illustration of p

his thickness, her opening, “being conjoined

siamese-twin-conjoined-animal1.jpg

“Penetrate me,” exploding fangs

explosions

swelling fuller and tighter, his seed’s explosive journey, imperative thrusts, heavy jets

marquee-787

Also, apparently his dick and his tongue are both velvety. That sounds like a medical problem.

Cut to later in the day/night/whatever, and Gillian’s gotten a call about Dracula her new patient. Aleksei wants to go with her, but the patient asked for “total anonymity,” so she says no, that she’ll take Trocar and Daedalus instead.

you keep using that word

Anonymity apparently means bring your friends, but just not the vampire because, get this, “With Aleksei’s newfound power level, he might recognize the individual and they couldn’t let that happen.”

By “they” you mean “the plot,” I assume. This is some Simone Biles-level narrative gymnastics. We can’t have Aleksei go with her because the minute he does, they’ll all know Dracula is her patient and that will mean the next book can’t happen, and Ace wants four books, so the next book has to happen.

gallery-1467143825-giphy-1.gif

Words words words, Aleksei needs to deal with a nearby vampire attack, words words, Trocar references banging the sluagh, words words. Gillian says, “I don’t want to get used to someone else watching my back. It’s not healthy for me if I get complacent.”

This is sad, and it’s also indicative of everything that’s wrong with urban fantasy/paranormal romance heroines. They have to be one-woman armies, or they’re complacent/weak/etc. Dear Gillian: it’s not complacent to have someone watch your back. It’s called being a reasonable person. Did all that badass Marine training fail to instill the idea that nobody is effective completely on their own?

Yes. I’m going to say yes. I fucking hate this trope so very much.

Daedalus the Sexual Harassment Panda dishes out some sexual harassment, and they all go off to meet Dracula the client. End chapter.

Takeaways

Eh. This was a boring transitional chapter. The most engaging part of it was finding the gifs to snark it with. I do hate Daedalus more every time I see him, however, and I hate Gryphon for portraying him as the loveable rogue team member rather than the awful asshole who constantly, obviously, and aggressively sexually harasses Gillian. In a series full of dick-swingers who are terrible in different ways, he’s a special kind of terrible because he’s so much like the men women have to deal with every day in the workplace. It’s just so gross.

 

 

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